Durians!

After all the tempting fb post
I finally got my craving satisfied!

although they sell durians here 
at the asian supermarket (10€/kg)
I dont have the confidence to:
- choose a good one
-carry spikey fruit in metro
so, I bought a box of frozen durian!

Initially I was afraid that it wont be good
since vietnamese version of durian is hard
they claim our version of durians is over-riped
with the asian supermarket full of vietnamese stuff
I was worried that it will be their version of durian

After 2-3hrs of thawing,
I was happy to smell the familiar stink
and super glad the flesh was soft!
in the end, it tasted the same
as our normal durians!

Husband dont mind the smell
and finally tasted his first durian
well, in singapore he tasted durian puree
I will say he is very brave
he wanted to vomit at first bite
but thereafter enjoyed it
and want to share my precious durian

It is not cheap (5€/box of 4 seeds)
but im glad to know I can have durians!

Roles in life

Last week, i was complaining to husband (as usual)
and i think what i said made him feel really bad
But i guess is normal im feeling this way
especially now that im on holidays and staying at home to avoid the sun, haha

I miss the different roles i used to play in my life
I know with the technology advancements, eg whatsapp, FB
im still playing these roles virtually (mentally and emotionally)
Yet, i cant help missing to be physically involved in these roles.
As usual, i should do something about it than complaining
or licking my wounds and indulged in self pity
but is hard.

Being a daughter
Maybe because we are at the stage of looking to be parents
I reflected (brain fuck) myself about my parents
how they did so much to provide for us that we can achieve what we have now
Seems like an investment with no repayments 
I have done little to thank them or do something nice to repay them
For my father, is a little too late to do anything

For my mother, I think I spend more time being bochup or getting pissed off at her
She may not be a perfect mother
but Im not a perfect daughter too
I guess distance makes the heart fonder
I start to appreciate what she did for me
Like how she often cook mee hun kway for me and tell me is so easy
when i try to cook it here and realised how much effort is needed

Frankly, i dont think i have a close relationship with my mum
I know i should call her more often than once a month
Part of me just want to call her when i have good news to share
I think this is common throughout my current relationships with everyone in Singapore
I dont want people to worry for me while being 6000+km away

In Singapore, i used to be so lazy to go out on weekends with my family
or worked so much that i dont even see them much on weekdays
and now, I actually miss (regret) for not doing that 

Being a sister
I think im really lucky to have a good relationship with my sister now
When I was really young, I think my sister took up the mothering role
LIke reading me stories during blackouts or feeding me when i was lazy to even hold my own spoon
We didnt have a good relationship in our teens because i was been a bitch
But as adults, we managed to build up our current relationship
that Im always so thankful to have her as my sister
And is not a surprise how I (even husband) feel closer to her kids than my brother's kids

At times, when she share with me her issues with my mother
I wish I can be there to share her burden
If im living in Singapore, maybe the pressure for caring for my mother can be lessen
well, at least my mother will have me as another outlet to vent her frustrations
Yet, there is not much that i can do for my sister
Although I can only see her once a year,
I hope I can still be a good sister to her like how she is to me for so long

When I was really young, I am closer to my brother
because we often gang up together to bully my sister, haha!
We do not speak often even when im in Singapore
But i do appreciate how he do take time to spend family time with us
whenever im in Singapore

Being a friend
Everytime when im in Singapore or friends come for a visit
I really enjoyed all the time with them
Of course, I enjoy having friends to verbal diarrhea and speaking in Singlish,
i realised what i missed the most is being a friend
being someone they trust to tell me stuff or ask for advice.
Im glad that husband's friends include me into their group
but I really miss being a friend as myself and not known as cyril's wife
I always suffer from friendship withdrawal symptoms after SG or visit
I never knew how hard it is be away from friends
Or maybe, i miss this part of me when im with friends

Yes, i can make new friends here
Im blaming that im too old and lazy to develop friendships 
Especially friendships that took so many years to build and maintain
The old jokes and how well they know me
I do not have many friends
but is crazy how my closer friends now have known me for so many years
and i miss this kind of connection

Being a colleague
I never ever expect myself to miss being a colleague
considering that I work better individually and dread teamwork
But i actually miss having a group of people working towards same goals,
with same knowledge and complaing about the boss
Now as a babysitter, I should be happy how is really an individual jobscope
However, I miss having people at work

I think the new role of being a wife is what i enjoy
Sadly, im not satisfied having a solo role in my life
Maybe someday when i take on the role of being a mother
life will be better for me
or maybe not
Hell, Im missing everyone back in Singapore...

Île de Ré

After the month of may holidays
and no holidays in june,
Finally the long weekend of bastille day is here!
since 14 july is a public holiday
husband and i joined his friends
for a long weekend trip at île de ré!
i guess it pushes us to go since:
- friend is driving
- both of us are not working on 13th
- friend has a family house there
so, friday evening we left paris
and arrived at 3am after 6hours of drive!

Île de ré is a island in south of france
connected to the main land by a long bridge
is quite funny that husband and i watched a movie
Based in île de ré before this trip!
im happy to visit a new city
especially one that is like a small town
and definitely looking forward to my first road trip
with husband's friends

Basically the trip is about:
-cycling around the island
-preparing meals 
-beaches
-suntaning
-lazing around the house garden
-attending bastille day celebrationa
-Stargazing
-the boys diy-ing a table

We were lucky to avoid the traffic jams back to paris
it was definitely a nice relaxing weekend
and we came back with a nice tan
(and mosquitoes bites)

First gynae visit

Compared to dentist visit, I think gynae visit is scarier by 2000x
After dragging for the longest time,
- waiting for my social security to be approved
- finding courage
- searching for english speaking gynae
- Finding more courage
i finally went for my gynae visit!

I think my last visit was few years back for pap smear
I told husband that I really need to find someone who speaks english
because the last thing I want to struggle with is French
while being naked and in a very vulnerable state.
Lucky that i live in Paris that English gynae is quite accessible
however, most of english gynaes are private and charge a higher rate
types of doctors in france:
- Type 1) Public: fully subsidised by the state (Fees set by state)
- Type 2) Conventional : Partial subsidised
- Type 3) Non subsidised
Sadly, most english gynaes are type 2/3 and located in the expensive neighbourhoods

Our family doctor recommended me to go for a type 1 hospital with english gynae
sadly, the earliest appointment is in September
So, i decided to just google and chose 1 English gynae of type 2
Made the call and appointment was in a week!

I started researching about gynae visit in france
and is quite scary of all the stories that i read online
- gynae who lost the case file
- gynae who overcharged crazily
- to strip totally naked for the check up (no growns etcs)
- to strip in front of the gynae
- being persuaded to have a baby
etcs etcs etcs...
Well, sounds like my fear of gynae visit will be worsen by the cultural differences!

Anyway, my main concerns will be:
- pap smear
- my irregular (non exisitent) period
- any possible checks / tests for fertility

Surprisingly, there was a receptionist in the clinic
i announced my arrival and sat at the waiting area
The doctor was on time and i was in her office at the scheduled time
despite being declared online as an english gynae, she informed me that she speaks a little english
So, we sat at her desk for about 15mins
To go through medical history and my reasons for coming
She was a nice old lady about 50+
but speaks more than i answered
Doc: are you trying for a baby? How long have you been trying? 6months?1 year? 2 years?
after, she asked me to go the tiny room (feels like an attached toilet) for the check

As expected, there is no special room to strip
So, i was to strip totally at the desk area and put my clothes on the chair i was sitting
The crazy thing is there is a huge window with a thin curtain (I can see the opposite building) 
Well, i guess i try to remind myself this is France
and being naked is  nothing

What i do like about the check was that she match each movement with a statement
so, i know exactly what she was doing and kinda make it less embarassing than in a silence room
Such as when she used her fingers to check me
And the tiny details to warm up the the opener (i call it the duck mouth)
closer to the body temperature before using it
The crazy thing is at first try, she say she cant find my cervix?!
I guess there must be still some difference between asians and french women
Anyway, it was completed in like 5mins
and i get to be naked with my legs closed, haha
She proceeded to check my breast  
Explaining her each actions again
while i was a little paiseh that my armpits were wet with sweat, opps
Then i was asked to dress up
and i rushed back to the desk to dress myself up

She then informed me that she will refer me to a infertility clinic to do a scan
The dreadful full-bladder-dont-pee scan
just to ensure that my ovaries are fine
and if there is any follow up, i can do at the clinic (Type 1)
I was quite surprised that she is refering me to a clinic instead of asking me to follow up with her
as she said that it will be much cheaper to do all the scans and follow ups at the clinic

Then came the surprise,
she passed me an envelope that constains my pap smear cells
and asked me to include a euro20 cheque and mailed it to the lab?!
The results will be mailed back to the gynae and me
Since i didnt carry any cheque book, i brought it home and mailed it the next day
Husband was equally shocked that i was to mail the cells
Like, what if i forgot to mail it till a week later?
or the weather is so hot that the cells wont be affected?
I can imagine the amount of cells in the postal system

Finally, was the scary moment of billing
Since is a type 2, i was worried that the bill will be more than euro150
After the subsidy, the bill came up to euro75
It is unsure whether our insurance will be covering more
but at least its not a crazy amont
Phew

Then i was ushered out of the office
and another lady went in after me..
And i realised the whole visit took only 30mins but felt like eternity..

The bad news is i wanted some medicines to let me have my period now
my last period was months ago and i have been suffering from PMS without it
Then i had a "lecture" on how she is not going to prescribe me any medicine
because i am trying for a baby and how i should let my body have it naturally etcs
The good news is physically i seems to be good in the check up

Oh, im prescribed with folic acid for 1 year
i went to the pharmacy to buy it with the prescription
and realised that the folic acid is fully subsidised by the state and our insurance
Well, free folic acid for the year!

Trying to be less lazy..

Its finally July!!
I was so counting down to the end of June
because its the school summer holidays till September
which means im not working since the kids are away!!
woohoo!!
as much as i love having a job and income
the end of june was so hard to bear with the hot sun 
when i need to be outdoor for the hottest time of the day to fetch the kids
and the kids become cranky with their need for holidays too..
At least, it marks the end of my contract!
I cant believe i survive a year of babysitting
even when im complaining like theres no tomorrow..

27 June 2015
At the end of june also means gaypride is here!
I used to love to be at Pinkdot in Singapore every year
although its more fun and grand here,
i still miss Pink dot.
I guess it really matters more to have friends than the event itself
As the husband was sick, we didnt spend much time at the gaypride this year
to me, is not really enjoying myself in the event
but to show support to the cause!
And im glad husband is a supporter too,
at least if my future child is LGBT, i guess husband wont want to kill him/her..
haha

If you noticed the LEESSANG cap

Yes, im so crazy that i bought the cap online

it is my cap because im still so crazy about running man! 

haha

With love from Singapore
I didnt know that my friend left a gift for me
before she left Paris
and its this beautiful zara clutch that i saw with her while shopping!
I have been looking for a clutch and its crazily expensive here
especially for those that i like
I missed those cheap bags shops in Singapore
Thank you so much my dear!

The other great news is my sister is coming to geneva for her meeting again!

Its really nice that my sister works in a swiss company

that there is always the probablity for her to come here

Well, this year will be her solo trip and i dont think she can extend her stay much

I think Im just so looking forward to meet up with her!!

And of course, i can start my sg supplies orders again...haha

However, she will probably be here at the week when we are shifting

Now im really hoping that we can shift before she arrive 

but... sigh is summer holidays...

Appartment

We finally signed the papers at the bank for the mortage loan!

According to the consultant, all should be fine for the final approval..

The supposed timeline was to:

10 August - Get the final approval from bank

11-24 August -  10 days cool-off period

27 August - last inspection of appartment

28 August - final sales contract and collect keys

29 August - shift house (End of rental lease)

Now, we are hoping that we can get the final approval earlier than 10 August

as we will be away to visit grandparents-in-laws for 7-15 august, my sister will be here 24-28/30 August,

owner will shift out around 10ish august, and 29 august is my mother-in-law birthday

that we really want to be able to shift earlier than 29 August!

Although we secretly suspect the notary gave the date of 28 August as he is going for summer holiday..

Anyway, our hopeful timeline:

3 August - Get final bank approval

4-17 August - 10 days cool-off period

20 August - last inspection of appartment

21 August  -  final sales contract and collect keys

22 August - shift house

29 August - End of rental lease

Well, keeping our fingers and toes crossed!

Heatwave

This year, we had a really hot spring that i predicted a hot summer

but i definitely didnt not expect a heat wave

Summer is generally endurable where day temperature average about 28degrees

and night temperature average about 19 degrees

Paris is not so well equiped with air conditioning as Singapore

28 degrees can feel like Singapore minus the humidity

Sadly, this week there is the heatwave

where during the day, it can go up to 36 degrees

and night is around 29 degrees!

Our little fan seems to be blowing hot air at me

and do nothing to cool down the appartment

Especially when the day is so long...

Im never a fan of cold food

Singapore has trained me well to be able to eat steamboat in hot weather

and i love to have hot food for meals

however, the heatwave won and i give in to make cool meals :(

Husband is happy since he likes cold food

and i tried to make cha soba without soba..haha

I pretended is a fusion...

I dont know is it the heatwave or im just lazy during holidays

I dont find the energy to pack for the shift

I dont feel that I rest well at night

I dont want to do anything except lying down with the windows shutter close

Oh, i have the stupid heat rash again

The heatwave is supposed to end in 2 days

I desparately need the weather to be cooler

or I may go out of control and impulsively buy a portable air conditioner

because is summer sales...

Summer sales

Although I told myself no buying because we are shifting

and to save money

Heatwave forced me to hide in coller shopping mall and lured me to shop

Well, i wanted to shop 

The summer / winter sales here are probably the best times to buy things

It seems that any shops will be at least 30% off

but i think i did apply some restraints in my shopping

Summer sales is ending on 4 August, so i really need to cover my eyes till the end

And last, 

I just want to show off this Adidas top that i bought

Yes, is totally not worth the price even after the discounts

but i couldnt control the adidas fan in me...